It's a new "record", boys. So good to hear from "ma famile"...
You'll never believe what hoppened Ace! Fulke showed up once more.
Seems someone down there in your "Alabamie" caught up with him. Some hunter or something.
Anyhow, the dude had this device called a "Garamen". Yes! Apparently it can tell you where you are, no matter where you are, or what "state" you are in.
(It told him he was in Alabama!).
I'm so happy he found out, for it is always good to know where you are.
Anyhow, we got a text message from Fulke, that in long and short, reads as follows:
"Dear lads...I'm departing the God-given state of old Alabamie in route for "jaw-gia". I should be in this never-never land called "Hotlanta" very soon. They've "loaded" me (how I wish I were...loaded, that is, on something other than petrol fumes) on a great choking behemouth known by local venacular as "thu Gray - Hound".
I should be arriving in Hotlanta momentarily (if, that is, this two-bit so-and-so laying on my shoulder does not awake in her drug-induced nightmare to slice my jugulars -- eeeks, she's horrendous! And, Gad, how she reeks. Worse than my kilt on its worst night. How's it doing, by the way. Growing a little weary of wearing these damned, infernal "Sweat pants" they were so kind to loan me at the hospice in downtown Birmingham. What a nice bunch (even if they are Brits)).
At any rate, I think I'll muddle through.
Looking forward to re-connecting with the band.
Please, if I may ask...next time I "hook up", extend the courtesy of allowing me to decide when to "de-kilt"...apparently Sally-Soo was really "hung up" on kilts. Had nothing to do with me when she witnessed the altogether Fulke (naturally: you know I've never had complaints). Fortunate for me as she was most likely NOT the marrying type (and you know I'm saving myself for Ms. RIGHT).
At any rate, grease up the mandolin, boys. Shall be a hot, hot time in Hotlanta, very soon!
Well CUZ, hope you'll post this to our fannies page. Always yours and faithful,
Well folks, that's about all I can contribute to the lad's comings and goings.
(Don't tell the lads, but I got better things to do with my time than being their go-between).
Hope the fans will keep the home fires burning (and send any reports of my family's "aspirations"; God knows, I'm living on the edge and praying every night for their timely "deliverance").